Searching for your purpose in life? Here’s your answer!

Ever since I discovered many years ago that our -- and other -- perambulating life forms
were created by trees as 'portable fertilizer sources,'  I've  never again had to wonder
about my life purpose.

To try this out, select a hungry-looking tree, scoop out a deep hole at its base, and
deposit your offering in a sacred manner. Cover it up well so animal will dig it up -
leave no tracks and voila! -- you've performed your 'purpose'! No need to search for
life’s meaning anymore!

I believe that we first come to this planet as a visiting human (portable fertilizer and
seed distributor) but not yet a member of Gaia's Garden, in which all other species
live a nirvana-like blissful existence.

If you prove nurturing to Gaia's Garden, you will be allowed to re-enter it after death
as any member you chose - a hummingbird, a raspberry bush, a dolphin - over and 
over in sheer delight! But if you prove harmful to Gaia's Garden, you will have to 
return as a human over and over again until you awaken. For example, the minute 
Donald Trump dies, his higher self (soul?) will look back at his existence and think, 
"Oh my, I've been terribly greedy! I'd better reincarnate as a scabby beggar in
Bombay eight or nine times to balance this!" Karma does balance itself out, but it 
is chosen by each individual soul and not imposed as a 'punishment.' 

Speaking of punishment, I was disciplined at boarding school by being barred from 
athletics.for getting myself and two friends drunk on the train  Instead 
I was told to run a five-mile triangle one of whose side passed through a wooded area. 
The wooded side I walked to appreciate it more, and the exercise also triggered 
peristalsis. I would crouch beside a tree to relieve myself, feeling somewhat self-
conscious but at the same time enjoying the pleasure of pooping in the great outdoors.
I think the trees viewed me with appreciation and love. Through their underground tree 
'network' - Gaian internet? - they spread the word that this human form 
was fulfilling his fertilizer-porting role and was 'friendly to the Garden.' Ever
since, I have been blessed with great good fortune in terms of health and friends and a 
sense of general optimism.

So my final suggestion is, "Poop under a tree - invisibly!  Fulfill your destiny! Never
worry again about your purpose in life!"
Why else do you think that fruit trees surround their seeds with delicious-tasting flesh?
PS: A quote from a dear friend: 'Shitting in your house is so barbaric. Only gorillas foul their nests, and they build a new one every evening.' 

And something to sing along with your movement